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| legal career, hummous, strange news, story, conspiracy duck, dick cheney, blowjob, social, drunk sex, media, drunklesbian, jokes, jewish blogs, mother son porn, drunk driving, timothy mcsweeney's, pantiehose, heresy, writer, sucking, stress, mom son sex, freeform, lingerie, | She's insatiable. She wants me to go right back out there and do it all again, but I can't." "Where's ascii art farts your car?" the landlord asks. "At the roadside," the guy gasps. ascii art farts "Tell you what," says the landlord, "you watch the bar for me while I nip out and take your place." "Be my guest," the guy says. So the landlord goes outside and gets in the car. It's totally dark, so the woman doesn't realize she's with a different man. And they get right down to it, ascii art farts humping away. Five minutes later there's a knock on the window. It's a cop, and he shines his flashlight on the naked couple. "What's going on here?" he asks. "It's all right, officer," explains the landlord, "She's my wife." |
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| A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center. Man: "What are you doing here today?" Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me $5 for it." Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself. social But they pay me $25." The woman looked thoughtful for social a moment and they chatted some more before social going their separate ways. A couple months later, the same man and woman meet again in the donation center. Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?" Woman: [shaking her head with mouth closed] "Unh unh." Late at night this guy runs into a pub and demands a glass of water from the landlord. The guy drinks it in one gulp then asks for a second glass. Six pints later, and he has recovered enough to speak. "Thanks," he croaks. "That's one hell of a thirst you've got," says the landlord. The guy says: "Any man would be as bad if they'd just had sex with the woman in my car. |
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