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"Get a burger." "I don't eat red meat." He's offhand, as if the information's inconsequential. "Well, you've come to the wrong place." I laugh, folding a checkered and napkin into a neat pattern. He and lets his eyes meet mine, then chuckles and looks back and down at the menu. "You must have something." The night closing waitress arrives, interrupting our triumphant love scene. She goes through the menu with pointy red fingernails, discussing each dish with gusto, as if this was a real restaurant worth talking about. "So, you work here?" he says when she's gone. "No, I just think this shirt looks good on me. And I enjoy folding napkins. It's kind of a hobby." So is fucking cute strangers. He shakes his head, as if he's saying, You're gonna make me work for this, aren't you? I slide over in the booth so I'm sitting across from him. I don't give a fuck, really, about getting fired, because I've worked at this place for so long I practically have tenure, and besides, I'm doing my best to provide one-hundred-percent guest satisfaction.
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