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| islam, open mic, mmf, laughter, interfaith marriage, female comedianne, stockings, pantie, agnosticism, anime rape., sumbissions, mad at, mom strips for son., rage, 1993, humor, sledging(cricket), drunkteen fuck, dogging, anderson, pissed at, jessica, | I waste no time admitting to our lack of chocolate pie. "That's okay," Peggy, my oldest sister who has come from New Hampshire, consoles me. "I decided to make a few pecans, and Jean made a Swedish apple last night. Plus your two pumpkin is five pies. We don't need standupny more than five pies." I'm relieved. Temporarily. Being the last person to arrive is tricky business. Apparently not for my husband, who has somehow managed a cold beer in hand and standupny a prime piece of real estate on the couch inside of five minutes. But I, on the other standupny hand, am a target for anything that is already brewing under the surface. My mother is on my tail while I look for a place to hang our coats. "I don't know where she's going to put everyone . . . she doesn't have enough places or chairs . |
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| "We are 18 for dinner," I remind him. "Do you think those two pumpkin pies are going to 1993 feed 18 people? If my sister ruined the turkey today, do you think she'd just shrug it off and not find a way to fix the situation?" "Not your sister." Whatever that means. We are, of course, the last ones to arrive. We are immediately greeted by the dog, Boomer, 1993 aka 1993 Bummer, on account of him biting everyone, including my mother's two precious golden retrievers that she would never leave home alone all day. Last Thanksgiving Bummer tore into Mandy, the older golden, in a territorial fashion, and my mother had to find a vet willing to stitch her up after his turkey dinner. We sent along some pie for him--the vet. So I realize upon entering the kitchen and finding my mother's goldens curled up on their travel beds, that this year Bummer gets to spend the holiday outside at his own house. |
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