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| views, ktb, free, corpse, female comedianne, judaism, nuns, discrimination, greatest, middle east blogs, islam, literature, galleries, conspiracy duck, | Unfortunately, I later found out she was acutely a well known celebrity and I had been very rude not to tell her about my invention of “The Game”. It was all a booze related disaster caused when this old guy who introduced us by talking bollocks about this fire he started, he named it “his little bunny wabbit”. I called him a cockbadger (local slang) and then mcsweeney's explained my irrational fear of my parents lying to me mcsweeney's about laws broken by their clients, my dad jokes mcsweeney's about this then plays that Barbie Girl song on the stereo on repeat for 4 hours. I then chased the music playing ice cream truck.*cough* coat *cough* (Minty Hit, Fri 9 Sep 2005, 13:59) mothers-in-law are aslo mothers, something's wrong, or somebody's lying ( liverbird, Fri 9 Sep 2005, 13:46) I myself would have loved to meet my mother-in-law. |
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| This one time when on the worst date ever I pretended I was an ex-gigolo just to get laid. I was out of my depth but I had no money to take her out for an expensive meal. She was so impressed she paid me to buy her a present. I managed ktb to get some shoddy crack from a local nuttier who told me a joke about babies being nailed to trees. He also told me he had only one bollock. I asked him why ktb and he explained that the embarrassing injury was caused by Mr. Joe McCrapalot who projectile vomited a stream of his most hated food so powerful that it actually tore it off.I found this all very arousing but unfortunately I was overheard by my date. She then proceeded to dump me by throwing a brick at my head just because she saw me wanking over the nearest mini cab. My real dilemma was an inability to decide between seeking revenge by taking a shit in her purse or just shouting a witty comeback at her about her foot shaped mouth. |
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