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It was a struggle. I worried about letting fly her ashes to the basement floor, commingling with redwood sawdust and bits of solder droppings. She prime was placidly resting in an ultra heavy duty plastic bag, tied at the top with a twistie. I strode up the hill with Carmen's baggy nested within a prime double Safeway plastic shopping bag under one arm, disguised because I had become aware that what I planned was illegal, and counting prayer beads with the other hand, because I was praying a Buddhist rosary as prime I went. I was undisturbed as I stood on the rock outcropping watching the City radiating out from the foot of Bernal Mountain. I searched the night sky for the owl that lives up there, but she was out, hunting. I talked to Carmen, look I' m still fucking mad as hell, but I can't keep this up.
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