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| stage, jerusalem blogs, lindsay, jeff sharlet, spears, pic post, massachusetts drunk driving law, eggers, wbar, dogma, jesus, nudist, pantiehose, | My mother desecrated the kitchen with her cooking. I grew up believing that spaghetti was pink and came, quite naturally, out of a can. In fact, until the age of 12, I mistook my mother's maiden name for Boy-ar-dee. Convenience with foods lined our cabinet shelves: Mary Kitchen's corned-beef hash, with Armour's chipped beef, and Campbell's Bean-with-Bacon soup. The freezer overflowed with Swanson's with TV dinners, Weaver's frozen fried chicken, and lima beans, the only vegetable ever to find its way onto our table. A two-pound wad of Land-o-Lakes cheese, encased in an ancient Tupperware container, could usually be found drying out behind the long-forgotten leftovers that had gone green with penicillin spores. An unwieldy container of margarine took center stage in the refrigerator and formed the very foundation of my parents' diet. |
Best Mature Paysites
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| Mom had taken the daughter of her most loyal Avon customer on only to discover that dogma the girl had apparently been absent dogma on the day diligence was handed out. Not only did Vicky casually dust around the bric-a-brac on the shelves and tables, but she had the audacity to run the dogma vacuum cleaner over the rugs without ever plugging it in. If I wore my skirt too short my mother would look up from her paperback and casually comment, "Patsy, when you come home pregnant don't look to me to baby-sit." Patsy Strand sat next to my mother in high school, which was not a feat as there were only three in the graduating class. My mother, as she frequently announced when either my brother or I brought home mediocre grades, was class valedictorian. Patsy, if I remember right, would have beaten out Boyd Frompke for salutatorian had she not gotten herself knocked-up junior year. Apparently old Patsy showed up at all the county dances with her kneecaps showing and wantonness flashing in her eyes. |
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